Things That Can Drive A Sane Person Insane:

· The tiny red string on the Band-Aid wrapper that never works.
· There are always one or two ice cubes that won't pop out of the tray.
· You have to try on a pair of sunglasses with that stupid little plastic tag in the middle of them.
· The person behind you in the supermarket runs his cart into the back of your ankle.
· The elevator stops on every floor and nobody gets on.
· There's always a car riding your tail when you're slowing down to find an address.
· You open a can of soup and the lid falls in.
· There's a dog in the neighborhood that barks at EVERYTHING!
· You can never put anything back in a box the way it came.
· Three hours and three meetings after lunch you look in the mirror and discover a piece of parsley stuck to your front tooth.
· You drink from a soda can into which someone has extinguished a cigarette.
· You slice your tongue licking an envelope.
· Your tire gauge lets out half the air while you're trying to get a reading.
· A station comes in brilliantly when you're standing near the radio but buzzes, drifts and spits every time you move away.
· You wash a garment with a tissue in the pocket and your entire laundry comes out covered with lint.
· The car behind you blasts its horn because you let a pedestrian finish crossing.
· A piece of foil candy wrapper makes electrical contact with your filling.
· You set the alarm on your digital clock for 7 PM instead of 7 am.
· You rub on hand cream and can't turn the bathroom doorknob to get out.
· Your glasses slide off your ears when you perspire.
· You can't look up the correct spelling of a word in the dictionary because you don't know how to spell it.
· You have to inform five different sales people in the same store that you're just browsing.